#26 Therapists and Their Own Internalized Homophobia

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Episode Description

In this episode, Isaac has a conversation with Rae Stout about ways they have seen internalized homophobia at work in their own lives, its effects, and how they have worked to confront it. 

Interested in Career Counseling? You can find Rae at, https://www.iamclinic.org/our-founding/

Episode Timestamps

00:03:07 – Isaac talks about how straight affection is odd for him to see sometimes

00:03:37 – Rae talks about the queer media they tend to consume

00: 06:32 – Isaac talks about research regarding conservative ideology and levels of disgust and the origins of homophobia

00:09:09 – Rae’s thoughts on other-ing people

00:11:13 – When Rae first felt like it could be okay to be gay

00:13:15 – Rae talks about what would have been different if they had come out sooner

00:15:00 – Isaac reflects on what would have been different if he had come out sooner

00:19:23 – When Rae struggled with suicidal ideations

00:21:23 – Isaac talks about attending a pride march before he was out and the idea of choosing to live in your own happiness

00:23:43 – Rae talks about how she overcame internalized homophobia

00:30:08 – Rae talks about cognitive behavioral therapy and thought journaling

00:36:21 – Isaac reflects on his personal story and his healing

00:39:25 – Isaac talks about the similarities between gay and straight therapy clients

00:40:32 – Isaac talks about his partner breaking up with him and suicidal ideations

00:45:00 – Rae reflects on the response queer people get from their friends and loved ones

00:47:30 – Rae talks about a date they went on and gender norms

00:49:02 – Isaac talks about a mother of a young client who brought research to him

00:50:23 – Rae reflects on people who elevate research above humanity

00:52:57 – Isaac talks about the six phases of coming out

00:53:41 – Rae talks about couples counseling

00:56:44 – Rae talks about how straight people don’t have to come out and using the title “wife” and “spouse”

00:59:20 – Isaac talks about his work with a somatic experiencing therapist

01:01:01 – Isaac and Rae talk about how it can be easy to lose ourselves in a homophobic environment

01:06:58 – Rae talks about it not being an overnight journey to be our most authentic selves

01:15:01 – Isaac talks about shaming himself and others and embracing his value

01:17:21 – Rae talks about allowing others to evaluate us and reclaiming that to move beyond internalized homophobia

01:19:56 – Isaac talks about Pia Mellody’s work and other-esteeming 

01:24:52 – Isaac asks Rae how they would talk to a young person about pansexuality and what encouragement they would give them

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