#29 Queer RelationTips: Holiday Special Mixdown | iAmClinic

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Episode Description

Episode Description: Jamie, Co-Director of iAmClinic, joins Queer Realtionship Tips host and fellow iAmClinic Co-Director, Isaac, as the two address listeners’ questions around navigating the holiday season as an LGBTQIA+ person. This episode touches on boundaries, family of origin issues and relational dynamics.

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Episode Timestamps


00:40 – Jamie introduces the topic on navigating the world as a queer individual, particularly during the holiday season, no matter how you celebrate it.

01:47 – Isaac discusses a previous relationship where they were not comfortable being out and the way it affected their holiday

4:24 – Isaac and Jamie go over questions sent in about how to navigate the holiday season 

6:51 – How to avoid challenging discussions with family during the holiday season

8:51 – Q #1 How to navigate when one set of parents know you and your partner are poly, but the other doesn’t

13:07 – Coming out isn’t a one time process, finding out how much of it you want other people to be a part of it 

15:05 – Discusses challenges with conservative religious parents and reengaging the attachment to their child 

17:00 – Isaac discusses finding the language to articulate your story, love is the same no matter the people it is shared between

19:39 – iAmClinic now has coaches available to people around the world for help in their lives and relationships, iamcouncil.com

21:01 – Jamie discusses the process of acceptance 

24:40 – Learning to put your foot down after trying different ways 

25:08 – Isaac discusses the process of coming out to their nephew, and the importance of a solid  foundation 

27:00 – Q#2 “As an ally, how do I support my child when nobody else in the family does?”

28:00 – Jamie discusses the importance of having healthy and strong attachments 

29:40 – Jamie discusses the difference between “little t” trauma and “big t” trauma

31:00 – Jamie discusses making a game plan with a queer child and how to show support to mitigate trauma 

33:07 – Isaac discusses defending the identity of trans youth and the “recipe” for equality and equity 

35:00 – Isaac discusses mirroring in order to help others and being a gladiator

36:36 – Issac discusses microaggressions 

38:00 – Jamie discusses helping your child figure out how to navigate and cope with the world 

39: 55 – Q#3 “How do I overcome the guilt of not being with family this holiday season due to [their] homophobia”

41:11 – Isaac discusses feeling guilty for protecting oneself 

42:00 – Isaac discusses building boundaries to protect oneself and “emotional climates”

44:00 – Isaac discusses how guilt can be a trauma response 

45:40 – Jamie discusses taking care of yourself and being preemptive about support systems 

47:00 – Jamie discusses delineating the difference between guilt and shame, or other emotions 

48:30 – Learning to recognize that we are not alone and that there is nothing wrong with us 

50:40 – Isaac discusses how our stories are an important mortar that holds us together and helps us move forward

51:55 – Protect your energy, preserve your holidays, and make them what you want 

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